Friday, June 24, 2011

A Theseus Art Interlude

A friend asked me for a link to a very particular illustration of Theseus the other day, and I was reminded of just how much art we have of Theseus and the Minotaur. Seriously, surfing Wiki commons, every other image is Theseus whooping on the Minotaur. So for those of you who do not feel compelled to google Theseus imagery, I thought I'd share some with you.

To begin, of course, Theseus and the Minotaur:
Kylix Theseus Aison MNA Inv11365 n1
© Marie-Lan Nguyen / Wikimedia Commons

At least you get a little bit of Athena in there. And she looks pretty hardcore in this image, if you ask me, although, I am not really sure what to make of the Gorgon face on her Aegis. Theseus seems to be starting a new fashion trend by wearing ONLY a sword belt into battle. Those crazy youths. But I guess if you're the champion of Athena you might have reason for that kind of confidence.

And for a little variety, Theseus... and the Minotaur. Now with BONUS labors around the edges!
Theseus deeds BM E 84
© Twospoonfuls/Wikimedia Commons

I actually think this is pretty cool. Not only because Theseus clearly accomplished MANY great deeds without pants, but also because it lays out all the main events of Theseus' heroics: (clockwise from 12 o'clock) his defeat of Kerkyon (by wrestling match), Procrustes (he used to stretch people out on a bed rack-like, or else lop off the parts of them that hung over the edges, so Theseus did the same to him), Sciron (who evidently was beaten over the head with the foot-washing bowl to be eaten by the Seamonster-Turtle), The Bull from Marathon, Sinis (who tied hapless travelers in between two bent trees, then let the trees spring back, tearing the people in two. And yes, Theseus gave him a taste of his own medicine, too), and finally the Crommyonion Sow. It's like one of those collector's plates you hang on your wall! Except with a little bit more nakedness!

There's a lot more where this came from, but I think that bowl/vase/whathaveyou covers all the greatest Theseus hits. Get it? Hits? Theseus killed them all? Ahahaha--yeah okay. I'll try to come up with some better jokes for next week.


  1. You crack me up! "...without pants..." Bahahahahahahahaha!

  2. Hahaha! This post is one of my all-time favorites of yours!

    I wish I had one of these in my house--authentic, of course. Too bad I'm not filthy rich!

  3. I don't know, I think you could definitely fit some more pantsless pictures in here...

  4. haha thanks ladies! I'm glad you liked it :)

    Valerie: I didn't want to spend all the pantsless pictures in one place. I might need them for a last minute post in the future :P

  5. Somedays, I accomplish quite a lot without a bra... but... nothing like that! That's amazing... especially since his jiggly bits would have slowed most men down some. (If I was naked and a man, I'd be less likely to "expose" myself to certain things.)


    Also... interesting and weird.

    Mostly amazing.

  6. "Theseus clearly accomplished MANY great deeds without pants"

    Bwahahahahahaha! *wipes away tears of laughter*

    Best. Post. Ever.

  7. Yeah, totally agree--that "pantless" line was the best line I've read in a while! Love the post!

  8. Every time I visit your blog I'm reminded of just how much I love you. Theseus INDEED accomplished so very much without pants! So much more than I ever have. Clearly I have catching up to do!

  9. I've been giving out Irresistably Sweet Blog Awards at Pop Classics, and gave you one :)

  10. Oh my, I can't even fathom how he fights without pants. Soooo dangerous! And Athena looks slightly bored but way more battle-ready. Ha!


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